Вагапов - написанные рецензии

Рецензия на «Соль счастья» (Куприянов Вячеслав)

Лучший стих Вячеслава Куприянова

Вагапов   17.05.2014 15:48   •   Заявить о нарушении

Рецензия на «Limericks» (Елена Малиевская Обухова)

Here are some limericks written by Alec Vagapov:

***
There was a pop group of Liverpool,
Who sang about the walrus and fool.
When asked who the walrus was
John said: "Why, it was Paul of course".
That famous pop group of Liverpool.

***
There was a woman of Leeds
who had five little kids.
When asked who the father was
She said : "Well, God only knows"
That funny woman of Leeds.

Вагапов   23.06.2010 21:36   •   Заявить о нарушении

Рецензия на «Вулкан» (Владимир Билунский)

Володя,

1) Твой венский стих я прочитал сегодня на твоём сайте.

Концовка мне понравилась:
"понял, что люблю тебя одну". Тебя тут любой поймёт: - везде хорошо, - а дома лучше!

- Алик

Вагапов   24.04.2010 07:27   •   Заявить о нарушении

Рецензия на «Пришли иные времена» (Евгений Евтушенко)

Yevgeny Yevtushenko

***
(translated by Alec Vagapov)

New times have set in nowadays,
and they have brought along new names.

They dash around, run and fuss
make enemies and kick up rows;
they cause discomfort and privation,
stir up annoyance and vexation.

But they are "leaders". There are girls
awaiting them in rains and whirls,
and peer through the darkness,
collating their smartness.

But where are your downright foes?
It's hard to find them, I suppose.
Oh there they are! Looking so friendly,
they smile and nod approval gently.

And where are your girls? Yes, where?
It's raining, and they should take care,
bewaring of getting wet -
they'll have to nurse grandchildren yet.

They've stolen all your enemies,
the gentle footsteps which you miss,
they've stolen someone's whisper...
All that remains is wisdom.

Why are you sad, you poor thing?
Haven't you stolen anything
from anyone without
even keeping count?

Young age is larceny and bluff,
and that's the miracle of life:
there's no evaporation,
there's only transformation.

Do not be envious. Be wise.
Just spare the happy thievish guys.
No matter how they fool about,
they, too, will be cleaned out.

New times will come some of these days,
and they will bring along new names.

1963

Вагапов   12.01.2010 02:19   •   Заявить о нарушении

Рецензия на «The Eagles - Hotel California» (Михаил Стребков-Барковский)

Дорогой Михаил,

литературный (поэтический) перевод песни "Отель Калифорния" вы сделали превосходно.

Есть только одно замечание.
В последней строке Вы допустили неточность, которую Вы, я уверен, сможете исправить.

You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave'

Что здесь имеется в виду?
Вы можете сняться, выписаться, когда вашей душе угодно, заплатив за пребывание ( обычно за 1 сутки), но покинуть отель, не уплатив деньги нельзя.

Администратор, дежурящий ночью (nightman), требует уплаты за пребывание, хотя клиент пробыл в отеле минут 15. Несправедливо это, но таковы правила (суть всей песни как раз заключается в том, в какой убогий отель (шарашкина контора - как мы говорим) парень случайно попал).

to check out - сниматься ( заплатив за всё время пребывания в отеле)
leave - зд. покинуть отель, не уплатив деньги
попробуйте зарифмовать следующую фразу (перефразировав её, конечно, на свой вкус, но сохранив смысл):

"Спокойно, сказал он,
вы можете сняться в любое время,
Но уйти, не уплатив деньги, Вам не удасться!"

(или "тебе не удасться ", если учесть, что администратор не очень-то вежливый человек.

Успехов Вам в творчестве, Михаил!
С уважением
-Алик Вагапов

vagalec@rambler.ru

Вагапов   02.01.2010 23:29   •   Заявить о нарушении

Рецензия на «Предощущение стиха» (Евгений Евтушенко)

Yevegeny Yevtushenko
(translated by Alec Vagapov)

Anticipation of a Poem

A genuine poet's instant rhyme,
the burst of his poetic feeling
is the sensation of a crime
committed by a human being.

The guilt may lie with someone else,
and yet he feels he should repent it,
so closely with the human race
in bonds of kinship he's connected.

Beside himself, he runs ahead,
away from fame and exaltation,
remorseful, yet he keeps his head,
defying self-humiliation.

A broken branch, a poisoned stream,
a grievous loss or, or devastation,
arouse the sense of guilt in him,
his guilt, not that of generation.

Hard is the world he's living in,
his life is full of sins, so frightful;
to him a woman is a sin,
a gift that is beyond requital.

He always feels ashamed somehow,
which fills his head with pipe-dream notions,
he paves the way by sweat of brow
in vain attempts to clear his conscience.

And on the very final day,
which is to come by God's volition,
he'll say: " My God, forgive me, pray !.." --
without hoping for remission.

And then his spirit will depart,
passed paradise, into the fire,
absolved by God Almighty, but
a sinner, at his own desire.

1956

Вагапов   02.01.2010 21:52   •   Заявить о нарушении

Рецензия на «Ты спрашивала шепотом А что потом? А что потом?» (Евгений Евтушенко)

***

You whispered in my ear :
«What’s then?
What’s then, my dear?»
The bed was made for two of us,
and you were somewhat at a loss ...
And now you’re in the crowd,
look beautiful and proud;
your golden bang is haughty,
your high-heeled shoes are sporty.
Your sneering eyes
tell everyone
not to confuse you
with the one
who
still remembers
having
once been beloved
and loving.

But that is useless,
anyway,
to me
you are from yesterday;
forgotten, like that fair
dishevelled bang of hair.
And how will you present it ?
You know I can’t accept that
it was some other woman
I slept with in that room then
who whispered in my ear :
«What’s then ?
What’s then, my dear ?»

1957-1975

Translated by Alec Vagapov

Вагапов   07.04.2013 16:00   •   Заявить о нарушении

Рецензия на «Идут белые снеги» (Евгений Евтушенко)

***
Snow flakes are falling
sliding round and round...
I would keep living... always...
but I probably can't.

Human souls fade dissolving
and leaving no trace,
like snowflakes they’re going
from earth into space.

Snow flakes are falling...
Some day I shall go...
About death I'm not worrying
I'm mortal, I know.

I do not believe in
any miracles, no,
and I’ll never be living,
unlike snow, anymore.

A sinner, I'm thinking
who on earth I have been,
what is most I've been keen on,
in this world I live in.

It's Russia that I love so
with my backbone, my blood,
its rivers when iced, or
when lively they flood.
its spirit of houses,
its spirit of pines,
its Pushkin and Razin,
its old men, so kind.

And in my hours of worry
I didn't take it too bad.
I may’ve lived in a flurry,
I've lived for my land.

Deep in heart, feeling anxious,
I hope against hope
that I did help my Russia
to the extent I could cope.

It may once and for ever
forget me, with ease,
but I wish it would never
ever cease to exist.

Snowflakes are falling,
as they do at all times,
times of Pushkin and Razin
and the time that yet comes.

Sliding like crystal beads,
light and bright as can be,
flakes wipe out the footprints
left by others and me.

I do not believe in
immortality... well...
If Russia keeps living
I'll keep living as well.

===========
translated by Alec Vagapov

http://vagalecs.narod.ru/Yevtuz.htm

Вагапов   07.04.2013 16:03   •   Заявить о нарушении

Рецензия на «Ma Chиre Divine Fellatrice» (Сергей Сергеев -Неллин)

в немецком тексте ошибка -
вместо "Die Frauen nannten ihm" следует гоаорить "Die Frauen nannten ihn"


Во французском тексте - опечатки.

"ma chиre Eri" - "ma chere Eri"

йl "el francais" - il "el francais"
tambiйn - tambien

С уважением -
Алексей,
переводчик

Вагапов   23.08.2007 06:07   •   Заявить о нарушении

Рецензия на «The House of Rising Sun - Animals» (Валентина Монахова)

сбои в ритме - петь невозможно
нужно подработать-цены не будет этому переводу!
А.С. Вагапов
переводчик

Вагапов   15.08.2007 12:46   •   Заявить о нарушении