Bulat Okudzhava
(To F. Iskander)
Our youth glides out quickly…
Our youth glides out quickly, steals the happy days from us.
All determined by the nature is too sure to appear:
Either wonderful, the wonderful, the beautiful indistinctly comes near,
Or the most unneeded something, well, the most unneeded something to you effortlessly comes.
Refrain:
Two lives you aren’t given to live,
two loves is a vain expectation,
of two only one you receive,
and it is just truth of creation.
A trumpet can play for a man
its tunes of good-bye to the heaven,
Or fate would be kind to the one, -
and he would be happy and even.
Oh, don’t keep for an occasion love and kindness - spend at ease,
Don’t restrain from showing mercy saving it for future wear,
For it will be gone for nothing, for it will be gone for nothing, - sorrowful can be your care.
Just the face will be more wrinkled, just the face will be more wrinkled - vanity of vanities.
Refrain
Pity, youth has disappeared; pity, the old age isn't long.
Everything is clear now; soul is hurt, the hands are bony.
Yet there will be neither questions, nor delusions – just a road, only a quiet journey,
Only the quiet journey to the tune of a parting song.
Two lives you aren’t given to live…
Быстро молодость проходит, дни счастливые крадет..
(Ф.Искандеру)
Быстро молодость проходит, дни счастливые крадет.
Что назначено природой -- обязательно случится.
То ли самое прекрасное, ну самое прекрасное в окошко постучится.
То ли самое напрасное, ну самое напрасное в объятья упадет.
Припев:
Две жизни прожить не дано,
два счастья -- затея пустая,
из двух выпадает одно,
такая уж правда простая.
Кому проиграет труба
прощальные в небо мотивы,
кому улыбнется судьба,
и он улыбнется, счастливый.
Ах, не делайте запаса из любви и доброты,
и про черный день грядущий не копите милосердья.
Пропадет ни за понюшку, пропадет ни за понюшку ваше горькое усердье.
Лягут новые морщины, лягут новые морщины от напрасной суеты.
Припев
Жаль, что молодость пропала, жаль, что старость коротка.
Все теперь уж на ладони, лоб в поту, душа в ушибах.
Но зато уже не будет ни загадок, ни ошибок, только ровная дорога,
только ровная дорога до последнего звонка.
Две жизни прожить не дано...
Булат Окуджава. Быстро молодость проходит. English
© Copyright: Вячеслав Чистяков, 2012
Свидетельство о публикации №112050902369
Свидетельство о публикации №112050902369
Рецензии
You are truthful to yourself! :)
I would change "unneeded" to "unwelcome" but that's my personal taste. "Unneeded" may be interpreted as "useless" not as "bad."
"Horny"? The other meaning of horny - "sexually aroused" - is so popular that the word seems out of place. Must be my bad upbringing. :) Seriously though, I suggest you reconsider.
The rest is awesome, except, of course, my fetish about being able to sing. I cannot sing your version. But hey, it's a poem first and a song next, at least in your view, so I rest my case :)
It is lyrical and poetic and sad - it does create the right mood and the right philosophical flavor of an all-knowing sigh. You did it well. I think your version is strong.
Best,
Евгения Саркисьянц 09.05.2012 16:53 • Заявить о нарушении
I would change "unneeded" to "unwelcome" but that's my personal taste. "Unneeded" may be interpreted as "useless" not as "bad."
"Horny"? The other meaning of horny - "sexually aroused" - is so popular that the word seems out of place. Must be my bad upbringing. :) Seriously though, I suggest you reconsider.
The rest is awesome, except, of course, my fetish about being able to sing. I cannot sing your version. But hey, it's a poem first and a song next, at least in your view, so I rest my case :)
It is lyrical and poetic and sad - it does create the right mood and the right philosophical flavor of an all-knowing sigh. You did it well. I think your version is strong.
Best,
Евгения Саркисьянц 09.05.2012 16:53 • Заявить о нарушении
You are really brilliant at your remarks. I'll see what to do. Thanks a lot,
Вячеслав Чистяков 09.05.2012 17:12 Заявить о нарушении
Вячеслав Чистяков 09.05.2012 17:12 Заявить о нарушении
Let the hands be bony while I'm away, in a week time I'll return to it. Thanks once again.
Вячеслав Чистяков 10.05.2012 06:43 Заявить о нарушении
Вячеслав Чистяков 10.05.2012 06:43 Заявить о нарушении
Dear Vyacheslav,
Decided to check what's going on in your and Eugenia's department and found your translations and discussions of Okudzhava's song that I also tried to translate several months ago. So it was interesting to compare.
I'd like to point out to what seems to be a frequent 'technical' error in your translation (much less so in Eugenia's). Namely, the poem is a song, and the melody has some stresses and pauses that one cannot move freely from one place to another. As a result, many stresses in your translation fall out of place. For example, the following words will have to be sung with incorrect English stresses (I capitalize the incorrectly stressed vowel): destIned, inevItably, indIstinctly, fArewell (actually 'farewell' has 2 syllables with a stress on 'well'),
someOne. (Also, there is something wrong with the last two lines.)
My own translation is found here: http://stihi.ru/2011/05/24/2649
I am currently in the process of editing my old translations with the help of a native English speaker. This one is yet unedited, so I'm sure: it will also require MANY changes.
Best wishes,
Alexander
Александр Гивенталь 10.05.2012 20:04 Заявить о нарушении
Decided to check what's going on in your and Eugenia's department and found your translations and discussions of Okudzhava's song that I also tried to translate several months ago. So it was interesting to compare.
I'd like to point out to what seems to be a frequent 'technical' error in your translation (much less so in Eugenia's). Namely, the poem is a song, and the melody has some stresses and pauses that one cannot move freely from one place to another. As a result, many stresses in your translation fall out of place. For example, the following words will have to be sung with incorrect English stresses (I capitalize the incorrectly stressed vowel): destIned, inevItably, indIstinctly, fArewell (actually 'farewell' has 2 syllables with a stress on 'well'),
someOne. (Also, there is something wrong with the last two lines.)
My own translation is found here: http://stihi.ru/2011/05/24/2649
I am currently in the process of editing my old translations with the help of a native English speaker. This one is yet unedited, so I'm sure: it will also require MANY changes.
Best wishes,
Alexander
Александр Гивенталь 10.05.2012 20:04 Заявить о нарушении
Thank you very much, Alexander. You are right, I am to change it somehow, unfortunately cannot set to it just now - I will do it some time later. Also it will be very interesting to read your translation - I'll do it as soon as I'm able.
Best wishes,
Вячеслав Чистяков 10.05.2012 21:17 Заявить о нарушении
Best wishes,
Вячеслав Чистяков 10.05.2012 21:17 Заявить о нарушении
Alexander, I've made changes of the places you'd paid attention to, thank you once again for the very helpful remarks.
Вячеслав Чистяков 17.05.2012 07:36 Заявить о нарушении
Вячеслав Чистяков 17.05.2012 07:36 Заявить о нарушении