Miserable Skin

"I'm still wearing this miserable skin
And it's starting to tear from within
(...)
Don't keep telling me that its okay
I dont buy all the shit that you say" - Staind, Please

"Why did he put the devil in me, clawing to be let out?" - Matt Murdock, Daredevil.



Days go by and night float past
But I just stand in place.
Future's scary, the present won't last
So why bother running at this pace?

Spending days without a point.
Living cause i can.
Stewing myself in disappoint
And failing as a man.

Spending my "precious time" on games and books, instead of study
Spending my nights awake and days asleep,
Chatting with monsters before they reap
Clawing my head from inside out with thoughts, while keeping my hands wet and bloody.

I hate that stare back from the mirror.
I hate the smell that sits on me.
As time goes by it won't get clearer
And i wont ever live, be free.

My soul feels trapped in my own body
I cant relax, i cant escape, i cant crawl out of my own skin.
The mind wants freedom. Soul wants peace, the monsters outside just laugh and grin.

But friend of mine, alao a monster, is here with me,
Sipping a cup of tea, discussing and debating
We can just sit down, lay down waiting
Till when the sun at last goes down,
And night takes over, relieving both of us from constant frown.

But at the worst parts of the day and night my buddy  just cant help me
Insides are screaming, the body hurts, while i am trying to tear off
Some parts of skin, I just cant stand myself, my smell, it won't wear off
I'm in a cage with devil's rage, no wonder you cant help me.

Im choking on the thoughts of mine
Im drowning in disgust.
I have to wear this skin of clown
While letting my own soul, get covered up in rust.

The cage is wet and cold and dark.
It smells like dead and rotten bodies.
There ain't no sign of hope, or single mark
That i could one day drown the bodies.

I'm still wearing my miserable skin,
And, sadly, always I will.
The cage is locked down outside and within,
Not letting you run or commit to a kill.