Lisa Ann!

Hey, who swiped my cassette player?
I'm sitting on the couch, clicking channels with the remote,
My hormones are playing basketball, and my brains — dodgeball.
She puts on her glasses and a strict blazer,
Teaches me geometry, but I'm a complete fool.
Instead of fractions, I'm trying to count her tattoos,
She's the absolute champion of any workout.

Припев
Lisa Ann! You're saving my boring evening!
Lisa Ann! My favorite sports dispatcher!
Your smile hits the target dead-on, like a bazooka,
You're a doctor of science, and my life is just boredom.
Oh, Lisa, assign me some extra homework!


Politics is a dirty business, but you're a real star in it,
Your parodies are better than the original, that's for sure.
I watched all your podcasts about fantasy sports,
You grab the microphone — and set a new record.
The neighbors are banging furiously on the radiator: "Turn it down!",
But I'm twisting the knob to make the bass go higher.


The wooden pointer taps the chalkboard: one, two, three.
I didn't learn the lesson, and now everything is burning inside.
She gives me an F in the gradebook, but I'm only glad,
Because tomorrow I'll come back to this personal hell.



Припев
Lisa Ann! You're saving my boring evening!
Lisa Ann! My favorite sports dispatcher!
Your smile hits the target dead-on, like a bazooka,
You're a doctor of science, and my life is just boredom.
Oh, Lisa, assign me some extra homework!


Class dismissed. Hand in your notebooks for grading.