Your Laughter Haunts My Playlists

A cycle of poems «You Taught My Hands How to Pray on Your Body»

Midnight static, silence screams too loud,
I press play - your voice cuts through the cloud.
Same sad song on repeat again,
But it’s your laugh that pulls me in.

I scroll through tracks we used to share,
Each melody a loaded prayer.
One note hums, my chest caves in -
That ghost of joy still lives within.

Your laughter haunts my playlists, bright and bold,
A symphony I can’t control.
It dances through the speakers, warm and true -
But you’re not here to sing along with me and you.
Every beat recalls your face, your light, your grace -
Now every chorus feels like loss I can’t erase.

We drove with windows down in summer heat,
Singing off-key down some dusty street.
You’d twist the dial, steal the mic, pretend -
A rockstar queen without a friend but me, my friend.
Now vinyl skies are cracked with gray,
And all our anthems fade away.
I keep the volume turned up high,
Just to hear your echo sigh.

I skip the songs we danced upon,
They cut too deep, they weigh too long.
But still I click “repeat” once more -
Just to feel you next to me once more.

Your laughter haunts my playlists, bright and bold,
A symphony I can’t control.
It dances through the speakers, warm and true -
But you’re not here to sing along with me and you.
Every beat recalls your face, your light, your grace -
Now every chorus feels like loss I can’t erase.

Found your scarf beneath the passenger seat,
Still smells like rain and peppermint and sweet.
I wrapped it ‘round my trembling hands,
Like I could hold what slipped like sand.
The radio plays that one slow tune -
The night you whispered, “Me and you’ll be fine soon.”
Now “soon” is years, and “fine” is pain,
And love’s just echoes in the rain.

I deleted half our mixtapes last week,
Burned them like promises too weak.
But somehow - somehow - you came back,
In a stranger’s cover, off the track.
Your giggle leaked between the lines,
A stolen moment in the chimes.
I broke down hard, let tears run free -
‘Cause even ghosts still laugh at me.

Your laughter haunts my playlists, fierce and loud,
A thunderclap inside this shroud.
It sings so clear, it breaks the air -
But you’re not here, and I’m still there.
Every chord still calls your name, your flame, your claim -
This silent stage has only grief and blame.

So I’ll leave the music on all night,
Let sorrow blur the stars from sight.
If sound could bring you back, I’d play
Our world on loop - come what may.
But silence wins when dawn appears…
And all that’s left is static tears.