Vasilich and la Fille mal gardee

By Boris Bakhmetyev

Of course, most of Vasilich’s workdays as the Cactus Vasilich in the office of the company’s top executive consisted of tackling complex bureaucratic tasks and crafting strategic plans based on a philosophical reflection on the past and the future. But occasionally, lively everyday situations would arise, bringing Vasilich face-to-face with raw human spontaneity.

One day, I brought a colleague, Vera, to meet Vasilich. Vera was a woman of elevated ideas about beauty, working on cultural projects aimed at preserving historical heritage. She had heard a great deal about Vasilich from her colleagues and had long dreamed of meeting him in person.

And so she came. For a while, she admired Vasilich with evident fascination. Then she approached him — first timidly, then with growing confidence — and began to gently tug at his spines with her manicured fingers. Suddenly, she blushed deeply and recoiled. Then she blurted out the following:

“Listen, Cactus Vasilich! This is outrageous! Appearing in such an unprecedentedly provocative appearance in our office — and in the top executive’s office, of all places — is unacceptable! Do you know what you remind me of…? These forms you’re showing off shouldn’t be displayed here…”

She spilled it all out and, smiling shyly, dashed out of the room.

Vasilich was utterly embarrassed himself and literally didn’t know where to put himself. And where, exactly, could he go? I tried to calm him down as best I could, searching for the right words.

“Vasilich,” I said, “don’t be ashamed of your nature. Whatever is natural is not ugly. What matters is that you have the talent of a leader, and people trust you.”

December 5, 2025