slip

I come to the surface with these bitter sounds
from another reality
but the remnants of just a second away are still here
my emotions entangled
you were there just a second ago
your presence on the tips of my fingers



the day gets saturated
covered with film-imitating filters
I don't care if I'm ridiculous
I don't care if I feed on the fantasy
one thin line, an edge of a breath dividing me
from the things that can never be true
but will always be real
as my mind is constantly reinventing you
recreating you
redefining you
solidifying you

my other reality
creates itself
as the underground waters
deep within roll and surge

the images emerge
the senses awake

my second reality
soothing and healing
relieves and indulges to the point it hurts
the second I come back to the surface
the second you slip away from my embrace
and leave me full of things I can't let go
full of light I have no one to share with
so I sublimate
and the rest I readdress back to you next time
until the second you shy away
The second you're gone
with the sounds of actuality knocking on my door
the second you leave me here
emotionally ambiguous
between the two worlds
almost happy
temporarily
almost happy


Sid Saturnicki, 27042019