It hurts my soul

The soul hurts, the Question Is: what is to blame?
 She screams, put up with it if that's the way it is!
 Payback? What's the payback for?!
 And what I did wrong for you.
 
 I have not been caressed by fate since my childhood.
 In the soul of resentment, then boil, then subside.
 I must have been born under the wrong star.
 That in life for some reason always superfluous.
 
 It's not pity I want to Wake you up.
 After all, pity humiliates a person.
 And I'll Wake up my conscience, maybe!
 Which you certainly do not have enough.
 
 How to break this vicious circle?
 Where is that string? To hit that note.
 Good, while you give! Did not give and suddenly,
 They're ready to rip everything out of your throat.
 
 Still, my soul aches!
 Soul? It has long since decayed.
 This wound gapes and shows through.
 And until it you, there is no of course Affairs.
 
 And I have long listened to the soul.
 I resigned myself, just as she told me to.
 How long do I have left?
 How do you live? That's your business!
 
 & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp; October 23, 2019. L. GUSEV.  (These are children who betray their parents. Rent in nursing homes, kicked out of apartments, etc.)