Stomatologic poem

I

Меня поедают сомнения,
А ты - нормален психически.
Нет большего унижения,
Чем ходить, бояться панически
Того, чего не случится.

У меня стихотворение,
Вам - наплевать клинически
На моё боготворение,
Больна, больна истерически
Поэтому и не спится.

Услышать хотя бы мнение -
Нет - невозможно физически.
Нет в наличии уважения.
Получается стих отличный,
Может и мне напиться?

---

Не жди.
У меня травы уже цветут,
У меня деревца растут
Не тут.

Отойди.
Мне бы родного воздуха бы глоток -
В шаге от воли я, ниток моток,
Да лоскуток.

Уйди!
Света бы мне от жизни, своего
И больше чужого не надо мне. Ничего
Твоего.

Не стой у меня на пути.
Я не вижу причин и преград.
Мне вот только мешает твой взгляд.
А ты этому рад!

II

..........................................................in need of proofreading

I dream of lying here in front of your doors
and this is how you 're killing by your magic words,
I see my arms bleeding for just not being ignored
and I'm not the one I'd decided to look like any more.
Im not depressed and Im not even sad
I just want to lie here at yours being dead.
I didn't do so when we fell apart and
I got up in the morning with another you in my heart.
Are you interested in this short story of my life?
This is my last breath and I already hold the knife.
I’m already not in my body, Im a ghost and I easily can fly.
I can stay here with you as long as I want until you die.

Do not make me think this is the process of growing up, kind of extention
Don’t let me look into your eyes like this Im a source of bad jokes that are always stay mentioned
Let me forget all these make me frustrated please
Its painful to survive but maybe Im not going to die
Don’t say a word don’t play a fool and don’t lie
And now explain me cuz I don’t understand
why I’m feeling much better in the end
May be from these memories of how I’d suffered, what’d led to that mess,
or from you showed me I lied with this linen dress…

---
In deep need of proofreading (or f***ing editing)

Dont extract that me that I decided to ignore, I ve only started to look like I dont lie any more. You look inside me and I feel like you ask "why you're clothed so strange?" but im not gonna change this Im not gonna change. Don't remind me who I am near blood and knife, I forgot, this should not last for all my life. This feeling is not  such things that are called "you've grown up", tell me not to disturb you and I will ask myself to shut up. Do not cause a dream of cutting veins, Im just walking just walking here when it rains. And if you provoke all these this is not enough tell me something else, please I want this link to be tough. And you cause pain instead, I am weak and got tired of sickness, this is stupid, abnormal, bad. I'm not good any more and I caught in a web, and the only thing I need is to forget.
Maybe you’ve got some reasons to be involved in this case? etc.