Your Lullaby

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*************Lullaby*******************

Mother, oh mother, why are you making me so sad?

As an adult, I`m grappling with the pain of knowledge,
A full spoon of it is like cold porridge
Swallow it all, stop choking, 
the label says it`s for a little king
With all the mental scars and bruises,
life is a boxing ring
I was so confused,
I didn`t need Vitamin D in the milk
I needed Vitamin L, oh mother!
you are my kryptonite, I`m your Kal-El
Tears`re falling on dusty photos of us both,
In a dirty storage bin in a dusty attic,
Oh, mother, I am your biggest fan, I am your fanatic!
We were hugging, now hugging is lacking
Only the whip of a belt is cracking,
The moon rays are like cold fire blaze
The wind`s breeze makes everything a miss.
After school hours, coming back home,
I felt left behind like in movie “Home Alone”
I am prone to forgiveness, but mother, under all this stress
I am a mess I need an umbrella for the tears of joy … less…
I loved you so much with all my heart
But why this love made me so hurt
I did not mind covering you with a blanket
I did not care when you ran around naked
With drunken outbursts with eyes of frost
I was a little ghost for the most of my life
I was thinking about a knife, take it to my skin
Make the cut clean, so you don`t have to clean the floor
I did not care they called you a whore!
I wanna be with you, oh mother, I`d rather
Tell my father to go away farther and farther

Oh, mother, why? Why? Why?
I long to hear your lullaby?

Through tears of sadness,
I am lost in eternity of madness
Distress you caused and violence
At one glance we were perfect
I had toys in Christmas stocking
But my friends would be mocking me
Finding empty bottles in your locker.
I`m trying to block it, forget the misery
Please, just listen to me, peacefully
Let me swallow my daily pills dose,
I want to be close to your blouse
I needed your warmth and kisses
But it`s all a miss, a mystery, a mirage
The discouraged little boy, I am
You are the only one to blame

Oh, Mother, why, why, why
I long to hear your lullaby?????

Once you left me outside in the frozen air,
I got all scared on my knees praying
Seeking answers through devotion
Suppressing my emotions with magic potions
Chemistry has become my best friend,
Where is the end of the suffering?
Answer me mother, stop coughing
Spitting out fire storm from 150 Proof Cuban Rom
But I will reach the stardom,
You did not see me off to my prom
What is the point of my survival?
I`ll get a tat stating “no revival”
But the music beats tell me suck it up and move on
And the bitch`s tits get me a hard on
I`ve grown to be a man and a father
Oh, mother, I will still make you proud
I still love you no matter what
But do you love me or love me not……