Limericked Alphabets

1


There was a young person named A,
Fond of swimming o'nights in the BA.
        But a very high wave
        One day washed her awave,
Which delighted a big Croc'o'DA.



2


There was an old person named B,
Who asked,
"To B
or
not to B?
  ‘I've been asking for years -
 ‘And still noone cares,
  ‘But prefers
not to ask,
but to B!"



3


There was a young person named C,
Who exclaimed,
                "Where's the WC?!
        ‘I'm expecting the worst:
        ‘I shall certainly borst
‘Before reaching the WC!"



4


There was a young person named D,
Very much fond of fiddle-de-D.
He often would saddle
His horse Fiddle-Faddle,
So they called him RiD-AbsurD.



5


There was an old person named E,
A painstaking and humble employE.
        But one day he said, "God!
        ‘I am utterly bod!
‘Why not rob /for a change/ the B.E.?"



6


There was a young person named F,
Whose lover was blind and dF.
He did not have a nose,
In her bed he would dose,
But his potent cock gave her kF.



7


There was an old person named G;
With his neighbours he never could G:
        Seeing them planting radish,
        He waxed madish and radish,
Turning out a frantic RaG.



8


There was a young person named H,
Who, at 94 MpH,
Bumped into a bus
And exclaimed,
                "Was ist das?!." –
That Germanic young person named H.



9


There was a young person named I,
Who wanted to lI and to dI.
        But they told him,
                "Don't sob
        ‘And be through with your job -
‘Or your mother won't give you a pI!.."



10


There was a young person named J,
Whom they called a notorious J:
              Holding them by the sleeves,
              He would dwell on his greeves
And the troubles of the kinsfolk of J.



11


There was a young person named K,
Who smelled a delicious bouK.
    And he muttered, "This wine
      ‘Is apparently fine,
‘But you should taste my Granny's alK!!"



12


There was a young person named L,
Whom they wanted to go to hL.
               So he left with a yL
               For the nearest dL,
Where he happily fL
                in a wL.



13


There was an old person named M,
Who fed upon mustard and hM.
       When they said, "Have some pepper!"
       He exclaimed, "Makes me happer!" -
That spicerious person named M.



14


There was an old person named N,
Who had spent all his life in a dN.
               Like 10 big dogs he howled,
               Like 10 gig hogs he growled
And sometimes
               he would fly like a wrN.



15


There was a young person named O,
Who observed, "Our pancake is dO! -
        ‘I'll take to my heels
        ‘From these wheels within wheels -
‘This is my
             second string
                to my bO!"



16


There was a young person named P,
Whose dream was to be an M.P..
When asked,
              "Are you a Whig?"
He replied,
              "Not a fig!" -
That MPcious young person named P.



17


There was a young person named Q,
Who told his girl-friend,
                "I liQ!"
      When she asked,
                "Why not love?!"
      He replied,
                "I'm above!" -
Such a lofty young person named Q.



18


There was a young person named R,
Fond of drinking cold beer in the bR.
When they offered him grog
And a bit of hotdog,
He replied,
              "I prefer them coldR!"



19


There was a young person named S,
A pretty and smart stewardS.
         But one day she retired
         /And, in fact, she was fired
Having said that her chief was an S/.



20


There was a young person named T,
Who had always avoided PT.
              But one very fine day
              Robbers stood in his way
Having made him remember PT.



21


There was a young person named U,
Who Used to change his point o’viU
             24 times a day,
             From midday till midday;
So they merged in a great Stain o’ViU.



22


There was a young person named V,
Whose life passed before the TV.
               She died watching the telly,
               From gripes in her belly,
Having surfeited with the TV.



23


There was a young person named W,
Who said,
               "Sorry, Mister, I trouble you!..
             If you want to be free,
             ‘I can easily free
      ‘You
from your pocket-book,
‘I ain't bubble you!.."



24


There was a young person named X,
Whose sole ambition was sX.
               But they earnestly said,
               "You make money in baid,
 ‘So you cannot avoid paying tX!"



25


There was an old person named Y,
Who exclaimed in dismay,
                "Oh, but Y
        ‘Has this terrible brick
        ‘Played me such a mean trick,
‘Having painted a bruise 'neath my eye?!."



26


There was a young person named Z;
Being glad, he turned perfectly red.
                When one day
                he turned green,
                They asked, "What
                does it meen,
‘You illuminous person named Z?"