Sed semel insanivimus omnes

I am so scared of smile of downfall,
Which will be end of my own way,
And the awareness of last struggle
In which my folks will go away.

Sepulchral cold of those ideas
Will kill all beauty that is near.
They look at me from wooden ceiling
Like bloody loop is over me.

Their silence covers me, like coma.
They’re creeping slowly, like a snake.
And when I sleep, that cunning cobra
Is letting bane inside my neck.

That bane is going through my body.
It’s paralyzing all my thoughts.
It says to me I am nobody.
It says to me my life is short.

Belief in this is getting stronger.
It’s making me so full of doubt.
And when hysteria is over
The suicide is coming out.

And now I am so tired and angry.
I have no energy, like slave.
I feel so calm of being achy
And not so far from my own grave.

I’m smiling broadly, like a madman
And with indifference to me
I’m jumping off the roof to pavement
And getting infinite and free.

February 2015