Перевод Fleur - Струна

По пожеланию знакомого перевела на английский язык текст песни "Струна" украинской группы Fleur. Очень жду отзывов.

1.
Silence falls
And the night is unspairing and cold.
Feeling vawe coming up to the top.
I'm ill, and soon I'll be a corpse.
I'm a chord.
They're bringing my heart to the fire
And I'm plunking as in desire.
I'm ill, and soon I'll be a corpse.
I'm a chord.

The sound's going through the string.
My love's coming through me,
Without bringing some heat.
The sound's going through the string.
My love's coming through me,
And I'm so tired of it.

2.
Help me please.
I see the Moon broken to hundred pieces.
Desert's coming, winter garden's disappearing
You're with me.
They're bringing my heart to the fire
And I'm plunking as in desire.
I'm a bell in the hands of a witch.
I'm so ill.

The sound's going through the string.
My love's coming through me,
Without bringing some heat.
The sound's going through the string.
My love's coming through me,
And I'm so tired of it.

The sound's going through the string.
My love's coming through me,
Without bringing some heat.
The sound's going through the string.
My love's coming through me,
And I'm so tired of it.

Silence falls…

6 мая 2012 г.