Буква А и другие - Edward Lear, Nonsense Alphabet

Сломала ножку буква А,
Упала и сказала: ААА!

Быстро Бинт, сказала Б.
Вазелин, сказала В.
Годен Гвоздик, Г сказала,
Если Гипса будет мало.
Д сказала: Дайте два.
Усомнилась Е: Едва.
Ё сказала: Ёлки-палки.
Ж: Железные держалки!
З: Зеленка. И: Идет!
Й: конечно, лучше Йод.
К Касторку предложила.
Л Лягушку приложила.
М на Мяту мажет Мед.
Н Носилочки несет.
Буква О все Ох да Ох,
П кричит: Паралич ног!
Ремешком, сказала Р.
С: Скорей в Спецдиспансер!
Т Термометр достала.
У, подумав, в Угол стала.
Ф - на шкаф за Фонарем.
Х храбрится: Хрен натрем.
Ц: Цыпленка для бульона!
Ч: Чеснок и часть лимона!
Ш: а мне бы Шашлычка!
Щ: со Щавлем борщечка!
Ьягкий знак ы ъвердый знак
Не обмолвылись ныкак.
Э: Элениума капнем
Ю: без Юмора никак нам
Буква Я сказала прямо:
Вот вам Ящик, вот вам Яма.
Потому что это дело
Всем порядком надоело.

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Edward Lear, Nonsense Alphabet

A
tumbled down, and hurt his Arm, against a bit of wood.

B
said, 'My boy, O! do not cry; it cannot do you good!'

C
said, 'A Cup of Coffee hot can't do you any harm.'

D
said, 'A Doctor should be fetched, and he would cure the arm.'

E
said, 'An Egg beat up with milk would quickly make him well.'

F
said, 'A Fish, if broiled, might cure, if only by the smell.'

G
said, 'Green Gooseberry fool, the best of cures I hold.'

H
said, 'His Hat should be kept on, to keep him from the cold.'

I
said, 'Some Ice upon his head will make him better soon.'

J
said, 'Some Jam, if spread on bread, or given in a spoon!'

K
said, 'A Kangaroo is here, -- this picture let him see.'

L
said, 'A Lamp pray keep alight, to make some barley tea.'

M
said, 'A Mulberry or two might give him satisfaction.'

N
said, 'Some Nuts, if rolled about, might be a slight attraction.'

O
said, 'An Owl might make him laugh, if only it would wink.'

P
said, 'Some Poetry might be read aloud, to make him think.'

Q
said, 'A Quince I recommend, -- a Quince, or else a Quail.'

R
said, 'Some rats might make him move, if fastened by their tail.'

S
said, 'A Song should now be sung, in hopes to make him laugh!'

T
said, 'A Turnip might avail, if sliced or cut in half!'

U
said, 'An Urn, with water hot, place underneath his chin!'

V
said, 'I'll stand upon a chair, and play a Violin!'

W
said, 'Some Whisky-Whizzgigs fetch, some marbles and a ball!'

X
said, 'Some double XX ale would be the best of all!'

Y
said, 'Some Yeast mixed up with salt would make a perfect plaster!'

Z
said, 'Here is a box of Zinc! Get in, my little master!

'We'll shut you up! We'll nail you down! We will, my little master!
'We think we've all heard quite enough of this your sad disaster!'

http://www.nonsenselit.org/Lear/ll/na2.html