The Tropic of Cancer

Oh, nothing matters but the longest journey.
( David Herbert Lawrence. Ship of Death, version 2)
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You have reached your valley. And
here is a short story for you.
This is a story of life.

It happened ages ago,
in the middle of summer,
when days were long and nights very short.

Once at a brook I saw a huge cancer shedding its old black shell.

That old dead shell was taken away by the rapid flow
while the cancer was lying lifeless, completely defenseless
with its tender scarlet skin, not able to make a single move.

I was a boy and I was scared and overwhelmed with that awful sight.

And now you see the whole world is going to fall to ruin.
Or I would say a bit ironically and bombastic:
it is gonna cast off it's hard decrepit testa.

And you are highly disarrayed, you are depressed and confused.

You see scarring pictures of mess, darkness and emptiness.
You feel deadly killing coldness of the infinity.
You feel so lonely. You are lonely indeed.

No sympathy. No one takes actual interest on you.

It is not time of a nice dream.
It is not time of happiness.
It is time of nightmares.

As usual, you awake right after midnight
or early morning all in a sweat,
with your heart full of fear, ache and despair.

You almost can't sleep.
Tachycardia became your closest friend.
At times your heart sinks or feels like going to split your chest.

You don't know how to rid yourself of the continuous horror and solitude.

Who will sympathize with you?
Who will give you a hand?
Who will warm and comfort you?

What a horrific spectacle. And what’s then?

You know,
there is no escape,
no departure, no retreat.

You may only try to put it all in order.
Try to build your renewed attitude.
Meet it all with your mind and heart open.

You can only accept the Covenant.

Probably it is your time to rise.
Time to get rid of the old shabby attachments,
to unmask the falsity of all the immature delusions.

It’s your time to learn and uncover.
Time to go beyond of the fears and tears.
The chance to unfold and meet your sacred Self.


See: the time to "gather together the tares" has come.
The time of truth. Scary time. Blessed time.
You are at the gate.

And now,
when I am almost as old as Noah,
I do certify:

This is not the end. This is the beginning.

Have a good journey.
God bless you.
Farewell.

Or
welcome back home.