Woman

Woman, look at yourself, woman,
Look at the state of you,
Woman.
Everyday by the shopping centre
I see you, woman
Swearing, smoking, drinking
Punching the bairns
Horror, you ken, horror
You are supposed to be a
Mother, wife, lover,
Warmness of the world
Every night coming back home
With the shopping like
“Look how much I can carry”
Throwing pots around the cooker
Never in a good mood, scary.
Feeding kids, dog
Who’s no one to take it out
Punching, punching to the right, to the left
For gods’ sake punching everyone.
Sticking yourself in front of the TVscreen
Watching the Eastenders
They remind you of what’s going on
 By the Shopping Centre
Later on – time for miracles – he is coming
What’s his name again? Jack, John, Stuart, Alan?
Your kids are loosing track of your men's names.
You – of your kids fathers.
But it’s no matter to you, is it?
Life is dirty and grim enough
The only truth is to live in it.
So live.
With your drugs, alcohol oblivion,
With your friends-neighbors-home unhappiness.
With your shit-again-in-the-hall dog annoyance.
With your kids-growing-too-fast-out-of-the-new-clothes expenses.
In your bed for a new true love waiting.
With yourself … poor and humiliated.

Was it really your choice? 

                Muirhouse, Edinburgh
                Winter 2002

*Bairns – Scots for ‘children’
*Ken – Scots for ‘know’
*Eastenders – Popular UK TVsoup