Out of the burning darkness - 2003

CHAPTER 1
HIDDEN DEEP IN THE MIST OF ROCKS
The traces of unopened love
Remained on the stones
And our passion cries on and on
On its burning bones
I eat my words prepared for you
Being afraid to hurt
Your divine pride and honor
And I’ll never be heard.
Hidden forever in the mist of rocks
My truth is (ever) dead for you
Falling from the picks of rocks
My suicidal heart will cry for you
FOREVER
Innocence haunted by passion
So hard to hold
Desires so clear but strange
Words of answer unclear and cold
For the flame of your heart.
One word that changed my nature
So cryptic but so sweet for …(you?)
Am I just a corner of this world?
Or still a saving door
Out of here.
Heroes of our own dream
Built like a castle in the night
We’re windows in it broken
By the morning light
So I would follow a single trace
Left by the blood of my puzzle
As you now try to hide my face
Suddenly turned into a muzzle
 Blaming yourself my babe
You shed killing smiles on my shame
Like you and me as one mistake
Like water falling on our flame


CHAPTER 2
A STEP BEHIND
When a portrait of mine was done
You wanted me to make a step behind
And I’m burning heaven’s son
Being in my dreams ever blind
But I cannot be just a piece of paper
Where you spit paints of your desire
Wanna be in the center of the gallery
Being never touched by the remorse fire
 When my eyes are drawn and alive
I want you to make them open
But this sad picture is left in the rocks
Lying on the stones broken
And here painted tears appeared
Flowing away through the dark of the cave
Hope your paints never turn into tears
Hope your next picture is never a grave.
Never know how many portraits
Were in the gallery of your heart
But this one and its maker
Will ever be apart.
















CHAPTER 3
CLOSER THAN EVER
Never being able to be your moon
I blindly believe in mercy of love
The night is in bloom
But cry’s heard from above
Once I felt the touch of burning mist
And I can’t be a sun again
Once you wanted being aggressive from me
Now I am to be a passive rain
A test of passion is not passed
Last question killed your will
And now I am to be your last
In the lane of burning feels
Once putting hands of longing heart
Into your depths of wills
I can just cut them to the end
And never hide my guilt.
Flowers of kisses turned into thorns
Words of love – into dust
I wish our love could be unborn
As it died between us so fast
Sadness that crowned will wander alone
Looking for tears of that time
Temples of grief built on these stones
Awake me at nights by their chime.












CHAPTER 4
ROOTS
Roots of the question deep in my heart
Will they be roots of fate
We need to get out the graves of our wills
Because it can be too late
I can not found the answering ‘why’
Roaming through dark of the soul
My invisible friend sent me signs from the sky
 And consciousness built the walls
Will I be able to understand
The own will turned into pain
If once more fate gives me its hand
Will I not take it again?
Gone into lands of eternal desires
Did I kill time being with you
Was heaven ever in love with hellfire
As I was so with you
Cold of your touches and fire of wishes
Flames burning this wonderful night
Cruelty of love and kindness of darkness
Love was lost of our sight
Morning prepares for us other truth
So I’m afraid to face the sun
Eyes cannot hide the yesterday’s guilt
Into the abyss were gone
Night let insanity be like a queen
Madness a sister of love
But your tormentor I’ve never been
Just not to stain our love
Tears of midnight tremble inside
Make the hearts lose wisdom’s eyes
Heaven voice always has been my guide
Whispers from unsleeping skies
Fingers of mist creep deep into hearts
Awake something wild to be first
Getting tired of promises made

You feel the sexual thirst.
And wounds made by broken hope won’t die
Now I’m a shadow of mine
If you tear down me from your heart
Just give me this killing sign


































CHAPTER 5
GLASS
Through the windows of hope
You stare at the sun of time
Rays that must melt the heart of silence
Love that can’t tell its rime
All hope in eclipse of… my mind?
Heart where the nails of another heart
Is your will invisible, am I blind?
The truth of ours to find so hard
These eyes breaking the glass by glances
Torches of my loneliness and grief
Just pieces of windows cutting the skin
Of the dream so fragile and cryptic
This game your heart will never win
Where my win is so mystique
You made me feel like a deceiver
A hammer for the glass of waits
Love of another’s fatal fever
Is waiting for me at the gates
…But where…
Once having a will to be warmed
You want to keep the flame so far
The sun, that changed the mask,
Is a moon crying over your heart












CHAPTER 6
THE NAILS OF THE WORDS
The past is meant to be locked
But there are holes in the door
The path I’ve so long walked
Is lasting no more
Where is the gone warmth of your hands
For my bleeding heart
Some words’re like running sands
But others’ nails to pull out so hard
You want me to forget myself
To be an icon of love god
You’ll burn it in the flame of grief
And bang it by the nails of words
Left forever in my heart

Here I’m crucified on the cross
Of deadly passion saying ‘no’
In myself I am lost
With desires creeping below
Am I raised by your asking?
You call me to the tomb
Banged deadly by the nails of words
Where I’m forever doomed
To stay a candle at the night
Burning up the grief
But your prayer’s just the last rite
For him who cannot ever live
Ever tasting the depth of these cosmic eyes
YEAH








CHAPTER 7
STONES OF FEAR
Die with me in the land of night
With no fear to face the light

Beauty’s ready to turn to my sin
To scratch the desire – to win

The eyes that hardly saw the madness
The heart that was afraid of redness

I hear the rolling stones of fear
Frightened to confuse the dream with here

I see another glow of her eyes
The guilt that opened by the sunrise

The smoke upon the heart it disappeared
But left forever the stones of fear

Drops of fire changing you
When feeling need of someone new

My word that make my statue strong
But I don’t know where I belong

Darkness can not kill their eyes
Suspicion suddenly could rise

Could I seem to be a liar,
Being embraced by own desires?






AFRAID
Afraid to see these eyes
Those make me insane
Longing to see these eyes
Again and again

Afraid to kiss these lips
This eternal flame
Longing to kiss these lips
With shiver and shame

Afraid to feel this touch
Like fire in my heart
Just want to hold this touch
But it’s sometimes so hard


Afraid to hear your voice
That voice of my dear
But want to hear your voice
With tremble and fear

Afraid to say ‘I love you’
The words locked in the heart
But want to say ‘I love you’
We cannot be apart

Afraid that you will leave
Oh dear I’m so afraid
Do not want you to leave
Afraid that love will ever fade
SEPTEMBER NIGHT