***

I've always tried to manage the situations
That are more connected with problematic
               opportunities, stressful relations,
But I believe I've never done my best -
Life is a longtime period failed test.

Sometimes I feel that I'm not truly connected
With real world - just as always reflected
On myself hating myself with my heart
                and my brain.
Biting and suffering again and again
                and again.
And I feel like I'm home but it's not even familiar,
And there's no people could be able to agree with it.
It's something even deeper than a common depression,
Than a usual stress and suicidal tendencion.